Blood Gnome (2004) Film Review

Posted: October 2, 2014 in Horrendous Horror Movies
Tags: , , , ,

Boobs, boobs, BOOBS!

Did that capture your attention? If “boobs” captured your attention, and you are interested in watching a creature-feature that revolves around bondage and blood play, then Blood Gnome, directed by John Lechago, would be the perfect horror film for you.

The story begins when Daniel (Vinnie Bilancio), a crime scene photographer, is called in to document the latest crime. Yes, this crime scene showcases two naked people who were killed during their “playtime.”

After more murders occur, which all seem to revolve around blood play, Daniel, determined to learn more about “bondage and discipline,” visits Divinity (Melissa Pursley) during her “special” sessions in her garage with her hardcore mistress.

Daniel and his “research.”

Daniel, you’re really going to call visiting Divinity “research?” Get real.

Now, let’s discuss the killer, or rather, in this case, killers. Somehow, these tiny demons are drawn to people experimenting with blood play, and they slash and claw and eat people’s flesh. (The death scenes are never gory, and the blood looks like paint. It was pretty disappointing.)

Oh, and these tiny creatures are invisible to everyone, except Daniel, who, for some ungodly reason, licked their blood off his hands and arms after fighting with them. (I guess he did learn something from his sessions, huh?)

But what I really love about these small creatures would be their knowledge of instant messaging. Yes, demons IM Daniel throughout the entire movie, taunting and teasing him constantly. Perhaps one might even consider them an internet troll instead of a demon?

Yep, the Blood Gnomes are online again.

And, like I mentioned before, this movie is filled to the brim with bondage and boobies! Big boobies, small boobies, bloody boobies: this movie has them all.

If you crave bloody breasts, demons who IM, and crappy acting, then I would highly recommend watching Blood Gnome.

To watch the trailer, click here

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