Freakshow, directed by Drew Bell, tells the tale of five terrible thieves who, with the help of Lucy (Rebecca Kochan), their scantily-clad leader, try to outsmart Lon (Christopher Adamson), their boss, and take his money.

As I watched this film, though, I discovered that the four other thieves, all men, were extremely unimportant; they only smoked cigarettes, drank beer, humped Cannibal Girl, and stole some circus food. (Great thieves, huh?)

Because these other thieves were completely useless and ignorant, it was, unfortunately, up to Lucy to steal Lon’s money. While I didn’t particularly like Lucy, I must give her credit, though, for having the continuous strength and endurance to actually try and accomplish her goal.

But no matter how many times Lucy flashed Lon or offered him a quick blowjob, she never stole Lon’s money or left the circus. No, instead she was butchered brutally and transformed into the Worm Girl.

Now, this scene was quite disturbing because the audience must watch Lucy being tortured by Lon’s family of circus folks, which included: Curtis the Dwarf, the Strongman, Cannibal Girl, the Bearded Lady, and the Human Shadow. Lucy, in order to become Worm Girl, loses her tongue, her eyelids, her fingers, her toes, and her organs; she is also skinned alive because Lon’s family tries to make her look like a slippery worm.

However, in order to actually view this graphic scene, one must wait until the VERY end of the movie, which means an audience member must suffer through 90 minutes of breast shots and various carnival scenes…oh, and pointless conversations between various characters.

Freakshow would have been much better if Bell had placed more gory scenes throughout the film instead of placing only one at the very end. This way, audience members would be more enticed, and would probably want to finish the movie.

Oh, and don’t use so many damn shots of Ferris Wheels! Yes, they are wonderful and reminiscent of childhood, but why must every third scene contain one? (Did the circus have no other rides?)

Freakshow should have stayed away from adding constant sexual encounters. (Yes, a movie CAN be made without constant breast scenes!) Perhaps Bell could have focused more upon the actual storyline instead of lusting over Lon and Lucy scenes?

If you want a boring movie filled with breasts and Ferris Wheels, then Freakshow is the horror movie for you!

To watch the trailer, click here.

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